lets Talk Gossip

Turning disappointments into opportunities may be one of the most difficult things for daters to do, because it requires one to move beyond their current circumstances and situations and imagine new and different possibilities. Recently, in my coaching business, I experienced a disappointment. I had been contacted by a reputable production company to be a dating expert in a documentary. I had interviews and an in-person meeting with two of the producers, a chat with the director, and several back-and-forth emails. We were all set to film and I was excited to make my television debut, when, a few hours before shooting, the producers emailed me to cancel. There would no longer be any filming with a dating expert . I was crushed. This would have been great exposure for me and the coaching business that I’ve been trying hard to build. So what did I do with that frustration? I could have lashed out at the producers; I could have taken their cancellation personally; I could have sworn o...

I read an article the other day that discussed the phenomenon we’ve all heard about or maybe even experienced, where people mysteriously change into someone else after marriage.  It almost seems as if your partner did some type of bait-and-switch on you. The article suggested two main reasons why this happens: (1)They were always this “other” person and they were just waiting until you were married to really be themselves. (2) It’s not them that changed, it’s you and you’re no longer giving them what they need, therefore they act differently.  I think both ideas have some merit, but they only scratch the surface. They’re symptoms of a bigger issue at work. The reason people change after marriage is because in taking on the new titles of husband, wife and married, they begin to unpack the notions and assumptions that they associate with that change in relationship status. You draw from and live out the roles, patterns and behaviors you’ve picked up throughout your life. These can come...

If you’re struggling with finding love online, listen to this inspirational story about a widow who found love again! — Want to know the secrets to finding love online ? When AnneLena’s husband tragically died of cancer almost seven years ago, she was devastated. She had just turned fifty, had six children in their teens still at home, and she didn’t think she would ever find love again.  A year and a half later, she was finally ready to date, and she wasn’t having much luck. Then came the pandemic in 2020, and things got even harder. She signed up for my course,  Find Love Online During the Pandemic and Beyond , and a month later, she found her life partner online. Following are the three secrets to finding love online. Three Secrets to Finding Love Online What AnneLena did to find her life partner online : She clarified her must-have list She replied to a man whose profile wasn’t her usual ‘type’ She went for the slow build instead of...

If you tend to lose yourself in a relationship, listen to this episode as I coach Salli, who gave up parts of herself in past relationships. Salli wrote in to the show: “I’m not currently dating as I can’t figure out how to balance all I have going on with work and home and my son. But in my past relationships, my issue was losing myself, even though I’m independent and happy and have a lot going for me. I focus so much on the other person and I’m anxiously attached, even when I feel great alone. I have often chosen men that need me to support them emotionally or financially or they don’t love all of me or fully accept me. They want all the good stuff and I get parts of them.” Listen as I coach Salli about how to reclaim the parts of herself that get lost, and how to prevent losing herself in a relationship in the future. EP 496: Live Coaching With Salli – How to Stop Losing Yourself in a Relationship Last First Date Radio Join Sandy Weiner, THE renowned dating a...

When I started dating in high school the biggest challenge of communicating with the opposite sex was  wondering what to say, not what tool I should use to transmit the message. Now we have endless options at our disposal: cell phones, social media, text, video chat, images and email to name a few and each has its own purpose, etiquette and meaning. But do we really communicate any better? Unfortunately, these channels have instead created a society filled with distracted, careless communicators, who find it challenging to be present when face-to-face. This doesn’t really foster healthy communication skills in a relationship. In high school, I was ecstatic to have my own phone; it was a Garfield phone with giant eyes that opened when you lifted the receiver. It was attached to the wall with a cord, in my bedroom, and connected to an answering machine, perfectly prehistoric compared to today’s standards. The only way I knew someone had called was to be at home to get the live call or t...

I love romantic movies. I love how they make me feel and I love how they tie everything up into a neat little bow and everyone gets their “happily ever after”.  I grew up in the 80’s and consumed movies like Pretty in Pink and Xanadu like they were going out of style. They were my template for falling in love.  I wanted to be the plucky girl who gets the geeky boy to come out of his shell or the wall flower that makes the hunky guy realize he loved me from the moment he saw me. It was OK to entertain those ideas as a wide eyed teen, but as I got older I realized I continued to drag around these unrealistic ideas of what love was supposed to be. The fact is, real life rarely plays out like a movie, if ever.  Life doesn’t work itself out in perfect comebacks, dramatic changes of heart and happy endings.  It’s a bit more complicated than that.  What real life does do is bring us lessons in the form of people, situations and relationships that are anything but simple and certainly take wa...

You don’t want to miss these online dating red flags. In this video, you’ll discover the warning signs so you can quickly move on! — Online dating is a great way to meet people you’d never meet in real life. But, just like the people you’d meet out in the wild, you have to be good at screening your dates. In this video, you’ll learn five red flags or warning signs that your online dating prospect is not for you, and it’s time to move on.  5 ONLINE DATING RED FLAGS If your online dating match has one or more of these red flags, tread carefully. If they have several, it’s time to move on. Looks Too Good to Be True They Create Sympathy Demanding or Hostile Excessive Negativity Ask for Money If something is telling you it’s not right, it probably isn’t. Online connections should flow. First messages, exchange phone numbers, a couple of texts to set up a time to talk, chatting on the phone once, then an initial meet-up. If the person doesn’t want t...